Self-Control

Main Scripture: “Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control.” Proverbs25:28 (NIV)

“My wife and I just don't have the same feelings for each other we used to have. I guess I just don't love her anymore and she doesn't love me. What can i do?"
"The feeling isn't there anymore?" I asked.
"That's right," he reaffirmed. "And we have three children we're really concerned about. What do you suggest?"
"love her," I replied.
"I told you, the feeling just isn't there anymore."
"Love her."
"You don't understand. the feeling of love just isn't there."
"Then love her. If the feeling isn't there, that's a good reason to love her."
"But how do you love when you don't love?" 
"My friend , love is a verb. Love - the feeling - is a fruit of love, the verb. So love her. Serve her. Sacrifice. Listen to her. Empathize. Appreciate. Affirm her. Are you willing to do that?” 

The dialogue above was taken from  Stephen R. Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change.

The scenario above sounds familiar? It’s one of those kinds of situations where someone basically makes up their mind about something or gives up on a situation based on feelings or emotions.

How many times do we find ourselves in these situations and what are the

consequences?  It made me wonder “suppose God made decisions based on how He feels”. I thought of when Christ was about to die and the cross, him sweating great drops of blood because of the anxiety he was facing when he came to terms with what he had to do. I don’t think he felt like dying on the cross but he did it none the less because He loves us.

  

I thought of Nelson Mandela and Martin Luther King, did they feel like going to prison or dying? I don’t think so, but they did none the less because of their love for people.

So why do we make decisions based on our feelings or react based on what someone else did? People get divorced because they are no longer in love. People abuse their children because they are angry?

The Bible in 1 Peter 4:7 encourages us to be clear minded and self-controlled because the end of all things are near. Ladies we should not walk out on our families because our husbands did not do something or he has changed. A covenant was made before God and our responsibility is to see it through.

We should not abuse our children because their father walked out on us or because they make us angry. My mother always says “they were not begged to be born”. Yes, we made the choice to have them so we now need to make the choice to care for them, not abuse them based on our feelings.

Ladies today I want to encourage you to exercise self-control - exercise restraint or control over your feelings, emotions and reactions. The scripture tells us that God gave us a spirit of power, love and of self- control (2 Tim 1:7). His spirit also dwells in us and self-control is also a fruit of the spirit (Gal 5:22-23). Therefore, instead of making decisions based on your feelings allow the Holy Spirit to guide you. When you are faced with a situation where you don’t feel like it, take a time out, exercise self-control and allow God to lead.

Have A God Filled Day Ladies

Let’s Pray,

Almighty God, thank you for reminding us that we have the power over our emotions, reactions and feelings. Lord take control now so that we will not allow them to control us.

In Jesus Name

Amen